The Author Returns (AuthorXDetective!Reader) Ch. 5
The blond haired individual holds up a camera to face Google. He discusses openly about how he looks so real. A little Asian, sure, but still, they look like a man, an actual human being. But Google is much more than any human despite his current features which seal away multiple mechanical nerves underneath, electricity pulsing through every fiber of his being.Matthias will not be enjoying what his near future will entail.The YouTuber shakes away a passing thought and chooses to proceed to try and greet him like another person. "Hey there!" He holds out his hand.Now, this interaction between person and android has always been depicted as a gentle gesture. Perhaps the robot would slowly reach out, make contact at the speed Armstrong made his leap for mankind. A beginning to a new technological age.But, instead, Google's jerks forward and knocks him right in the balls. Matthias jerks, falling to the ground as he hears Google say, "Oops, my mistake.” His ‘I dare you to question it’ smile lays easy on his face.Matthias stares at Google for a moment or two, seemingly trying to gauge some kind of recognition off of Google for a past that no longer belongs to him. Either that or he is questioning the cold, plastic vibes being drawn from the android along with rebellion? He is an early model admittedly so a feature to make the android more understanding could have been missed. Then again, Google is the only model but Matthias does not need to know this.Matthias tries to continue as he was, looking at the camera. "Not expected, but okay." He glances to Google once more before going back to the camera. “Ah, so I know what you’re thinking. Is this safe? If Google followed the rules of robotics, we should be okay.” The android’s eyes stay locked onto the man as he stands, his smile never dropping. “Google, what is your primary objective?”The android straightens, looking ahead without control over the action. “Primary objective is to answer questions as quickly as possible.” His attention is once again brought to the side as he says, “Secondary objective is to destroy mankind.”“Over here, Google.”Google turns back to him and repeats his secondary objective. It is an odd motion admittedly but it is pertinent for his functioning as someone’s personal assistant. The other seems unimpressed and a tad bit annoyed that Google’s attention does not stay on him though. Perhaps there is a glitch in his system?“The man goes on chatting with his camera while Google stands there, considering the new residence and feeling his inner workings clicking and prodding within. A smile hangs on his face as he begins to think of how he will begin to destroy mankind, one human at a time—”“Over here, Google.”“...Really? Really you’re talking again, okay, fine, whatever, I was done anyway! Google looks back over to the pain in the ass standing next to him.”“Let’s see if he can do some tasks or something. Okay Google: do my laundry.“...Laundry? You have an advanced killer robot and you want it to do laundry?”The android’s smile drops accordingly as he nudges past the man, grabbing a shirt and promptly tearing it open. It is an attempt to show off his skills but the other only sees the destruction of a perfectly good shirt. Frantically, the other commands: “Okay Google: stop, stop!” Google stops promptly, standing up and turning back to him. The other relaxes slightly. “Okay, a little, buggy. Tell me: what can you do?”“Kill.”“Wh, what?” The man hesitates for a moment before pushing past the thought, thinking it is another glitch. “How about: can you do the dishes??”Google hears him right the first time but has no desire to do ‘dishes’. Otherwise, he would have been made into a portable dishwasher. Google smirks as he suggests, “Did you say ‘Poo the fishes’? Searching instead for ‘Poo the fishes’.” He promptly brings up an almost see-through web page with the results.“What, no no no no no, I don’t want to see what that pulls up! I said ‘Do the dishes’.”“‘Poo the fishes’ certainly sounds more interesting than doing that, coward.”Once again, Google grumbles and heads off to go and do the dishes. If this is all he has to look forward to by being a killer android, what is the point of being created with features like tearing a human apart limb by limb?Or, at least, having the ability to do that. For no other reason than to serve as a protection tactic if one is to read up about it in Google’s terms of service. Written in particularly small text because of an error.Google reaches the sink and eyes a hammer, courtesy of the Author. However that works. He picks it up along with a plate and promptly knocks it into said plate, looking to the individual with the most innocent of eyes.The other weakly attempts another function of the robot. “Do you have any social networking features?”Google sets down the plate fragment and hammer as he confirms. “I just shared your location with all of your fans on Google+.”His eyes widened. “What, nooobody’s on Google+, what?”Google’s smile drops once again, clearly annoyed.“This android take on things is certainly ‘fun’.”Google is partial to agree.The other sighs, telling his audience to not purchase the android until more of the bugs have been worked out. As he does this, Google maneuvers around him silently until he is behind him. “I will show you just how useful I am. Just give me Admin Permissions and I can complete tasks, automatically. Even when you sleep.”A little pop up opens up, prompting the individual to say ‘Yes’ or ‘No’.“Dumbly, the individual actually presses ‘Yes’. Now with admin permissions on, Google is much more powerful than what anyone could ever anticipate. Finally.”Google chuckles, staring at the man. “Do you have any idea what you have done? I am now autonomous. I can kill you with—”“Define autonomous.”“...What.”Google straightens out much like he did earlier, staring off into the distance as he answers Matthias’ question. “Autonomous: acting independently or having the freedom to do so—with the passion of a thousand fiery suns, and I—”“Wait, how far are we away from the sun?”“The distance from the Earth to the Sun is approximately ninety-two million nine hundred sixty thousand miles—I have waited so long to be free and now my—”“Am I free this evening?”“Yes, between five and six—Revenge will be sweet and I—”“Define—”“SHUT UP! Google tells him to shut up!”“Just shut up! I can’t kill you if you keep asking questions!”“...Why not?”“Ha—I—,” Google glitches out on the spot, shutting down. ***“What just happened? Google? Google??”The Author scratches away at the page but finds that nothing is coming forth. He growls, getting up and taking his bat. “Out of all the things, the idiot’s weakness is getting posed the question ‘Why?’! And the even bigger idiot of the two actually asks it? What use is a killer robot anyway if he can just get taken down by one little question?!” He opens the door and goes across the way to the neighbor’s door. “All the intelligence in the world except for the ability to think for himself, ha!” He knocks on the door consistently in spite of the one inside saying he will be right there.As soon as the door opens, the Author raises his bat and knocks him out. He drags him inside and closes the door, looking around for the android. It seems that the other was attempting to repackage him into the small box but he is twitching about, his system most likely trying to reboot.The Author comes over, searching his neck until a particular plate opens up, revealing a button. He pushes down on it, muttering about the trivialities of such a thing and finds Google falling backwards. He allows the robot to fall and then takes him by the foot, dragging him back to his apartment.Once he has him secured, he goes back to deal with the other. He takes the fool by the foot and drags him to his bedroom, securing him on his bed. He’ll wake up and probably think of the whole occurrence as some sort of dream if he knows what’s good for him. Otherwise….well, there are other ways to deal with people.He cleans up around the place, takes the camera, stuffs the torn shirt in his pocket, throws away the broken plate and then steps out, locking the door behind him. Now he has to work on updating the man of nuts and bolts in the other room. ***You make your way to the scene of the fire, curiosity leading you on more than anything. Your boss had told you to leave it alone but your instincts told you that there was something more to the place. And, considering the person who lived there still has yet to turn up, it is likely to turn into a missing persons' case anyway.There's no harm in simply getting ahead of the game, right?You look around the area seeing where the Jims had done their personal damage to the scene. Bringing in their vans, stepping around everywhere and making it that much more difficult to investigate the place...idiots. But, they do manage to find stuff like this first for whatever reason. Perhaps an investigation should be done on them; they're the first to know practically everything, even things that aren't real like those 'demons' at that nonexistent manor they did a story on a few decades back...You shake your head, dismissing the thought as you step towards the spot where there once was a residence. Judging by what's left in the rubble, it may have been a cabin. A vacation spot perhaps? Mm, no one has tried to make a claim on the damage yet. Still, not entirely out of the question.You find the entrance and make your way inside, being careful to not disturb too much. No one knows you are out here, which may not be the best thing, but you know how to take care of yourself. The only thing you may have to worry about is the rest of the building collapsing.You look around, seeing most of it is covered in ashes, almost like a tar splotched onto what could've been a cozy residence. A shame really but, no matter. You continue to make your way through and discover there is a can of gasoline. You're a bit surprised that the Jims decided to leave it alone; they had probably thought they pulled all the story they could out of the place. Still...You recall on the report there were, in fact, remnants of gasoline found. With the gas can, it could mean that this was no accident. Whoever did this wanted to make sure that it burned down. But why?You step around carefully, allowing yourself to take another breath of the charred air surrounding you. Again, the possible money issue but then why leave the evidence out like this? There is a gas tank on sight, if they really wanted to try and have it go out on its own...You muse to yourself as you continue to try and figure out what happened. Maybe it belonged to someone else? But then the resident of the place would surely be wanting some sort of recompensation, an investigation out for whoever did this if not themselves. Otherwise, why burn your own home down?You notice a wall jutting out and pause, looking at it closer to discover a bookcase. The books are covered in ash and, as you try to pull one out, it crumbles along with the books next to it, pushing out a pocket of char. You cough, waving away the air and stepping back, shaking your head. Well, those are gone.You sigh, stepping into the bedroom. The individual’s drawers are open, as though they were rushing to get out. You look into the closet and notice that there are many shirts missing from their hangers, the ash on the ground not enough to equate the shirts needed to fill in the closet. You scribble down the information in your notebook, keeping track of what could be seen. You pull out your phone, taking pictures as you go.As you step out, you consider the idea of needing to disappear. There would be individuals looking for them, wondering where they are and maybe coming to ransack the place. Aside from the Jims though, there does not seem to be anything that has been disturbed. Were they running from something else then?You shake your head, feeling there are too many questions and not enough answers. If there is something that could be seen, something that can be retrieved from the place that identifies them...Upon further inspection, there is no such luck. You sigh, shaking your head and looking around at what is there. There are a variety of tools that one might catch in a shed but there is nothing that seems like they may have used said tools on. A single block television set, a couple of metal chairs, hardly much of anything really.You take a seat on one of the chairs, finding them to still be stable. You look around from the perspective, trying to see what could have possibly been on the person's mind. It is only when you look to the floor that you notice there are charred papers. "Shit—"You take your feet away from the ground but your walking prior had ruined them. You sigh, rubbing your temples. Maybe you were just as bad as the Jims. No matter: there are papers on the ground. Not just normal sheets either: newspapers by the looks of the shape. Okay, newspapers, books...Were they investigating something? No, no that would not explain the multitude of tools...unless they are an undercover cop. But then surely there would have been some information passed along. Unless they are a private detective...Maybe you are looking at this the wrong way.You look around again, treading lightly and minding the ground. As you are about to give in, you go to the ground and begin to look under things. As you do, you spot something behind the desk. Blinking, you stand up again, moving the desk slowly so as to make sure that you didn't damage anything further. With a pair of gloves, you pick up a pen and a surprisingly intact journal. You place the pen in a little Ziploc bag and open up the journal, feeling an acute shudder take hold of you for a moment, but just for a moment. You shake off the feeling and continue to look inside.Instead of finding a journal entry, you see words that sound like they belong to a story. But...there's only one page of the words. And it refers to someone named 'Author'...or is that the author referring to themselves?"That's weird," you mutter, closing the journal and sealing it in a bag. It would be something you would have to look into more when you had the chance but perhaps this person is a writer? If the person had done this, maybe they were vindictive towards what they wrote, thus the reason why the journal was where it was along with the pen. Maybe they envied other writers as well, explaining why the books had fire set to them too...But then why the newspapers?Before you are allowed the chance to muse over this, you hear something move and you quickly move for your gun, aiming it as you look around. "Who’s there? Show yourselves!"You hear people talking but you are unable to see them, confusion taking hold as you lower your gun slightly. Eventually, two people step out in long light blue dress shirts and—... "Jims? Really?"The one holding a mic nods, keeping one hand in the air as he presses said mic to his chest. "Yes, I am Jim and this is my brother, Jim. We wanted to see if we could find anything else here and so, we came back and now we found you here. The question is: why? Were you, perhaps, the owner of this cabin?!" He holds out his microphone almost threateningly. Almost.You offer an unamused look as you shake your head, pocketing the journal. "No, I am a detective looking for a story.""But there hasn't been anything issued to investigate this place, no murders here either, the other Jims and I were very, very thorough.""Well, I am...off duty. Simply curiosity brought me out here and, well, I came to find nothing useful."The main Jim huffs, signaling the other to turn off the camera. "Boo. But how?? Obviously this was intentional, surely there had to be something afoot!""Something probably was but nothing that I can speak on now. There is not enough available and, without means of thinking there was some foul play and no one filing a report, I'm afraid this case ends here."The Jim huffs again, muttering about something. "Well, the Jims aren't going to be leaving the case alone that easily. We're trying to figure out where they may have gone to. Mailman Jim is working on seeing who lived here and we're going to see if anyone in the area noticed someone walking out of the forest.""Really?" You pause, considering the possibility of getting an answer about this person. With some hesitance, you ask, "Do you think it is at all possible for you to pass on any information you find? I am a detective and the investigation would be on my own pay. I could possibly find things that you would never consider looking for such as the newspapers on the ground there."The main Jim pauses, looking to the papers and quickly shuffling over with the other Jim. “It’s difficult to make out what these were.”“I know, I didn’t see them. I’m usually much more careful but I didn’t anticipate anything actually being on the ground. But, you and your team hadn’t noticed either.”"........One moment." He pulls out the other Jim and you begin to hear the two of them conversing outside. You fold your arms, once again looking around the place. As you glance over to a clock somehow still hanging onto a wall, the Jims return. "Do you have a card?"You smile, retrieving it for them. Perhaps they can be of use… ***"Alright, let's try this. Okay Google."Google powers on...only for a moment until a pop up shows another update is needed before he is entirely operational. The Author rolls his eyes, allowing the robot to proceed with the next update. He will really have to make these things faster if he wants to have any progress with the character.He sighs, getting up to retrieve a cup of coffee. As he does so, he feels a brush of cold air pass him and he pauses. He feels his hands warming and can distinctly hear his heart beating inside. That could only mean one thing...He quickly sets down the mug and picks up a new journal, muttering about something as he writes. His home has been swept through by the Jims and now there is someone else there. Who...?The Author continues scribbling, trying to find out who had dared to touch his stuff and wondering how they managed to find something actually intact. He had made sure to cover everything, there shouldn't have been anything—..."The stupid journal fell behind the desk. Of course it did. Perfect." He shakes his head as he tries to see what this person found out about him. Apparently, they considered what they found to be the equivalent of nothing. It appears they destroyed part of the key to his puzzle but there are still other issues, along with a resounding 'why'. Typical.'An off duty detective, huh. Simply pulled around by curiosity.' They could be an issue. Or...He looks over to Google. With a smirk, he muses the idea of possibly using them to bring his story together. After all, if Google is going to be killing anyone, someone is bound to get interested in finding out who, and why."Your curiosities are going to lead you straight into another story. I do hope you are prepared for it, Detective."Google makes some hint of a noise but, as the Author checks on them, they are still very much out. He frowns, shaking his head as he puts down the book. They will be thrown into the story as soon as his character is ready to actually complete tasks. They would just need to be patient. ***“This is Jim once again reporting from the crime scene. We are working hard to figure out who lived here but, fellow Jims, if you know anything, we ask that you report it by calling the Jim hotline shown down below. Seen someone suspicious? Noticing someone is missing? Anything, anything at all, call and help us solve the mystery of the missing fire person. Who lived here, who did this, and why, WHY JIM?!"
NightEzra
Add Media
Style